"The best food in Chicago and that's no toke...uh, joke!"



(Sorry, I couldn't resist)

Thanks to Jane M. for spotting this one!

I'm prepared...

ADmonishments is about signage going hilariously wrong...even if it was done on purpose.



Just in case, you might want to pick up a copy of the Zombie Survival Guide.

Try it! It's fun!

No, it's not Signage Saturday (have you sent in your witty comment yet?) - but who says I can't post signs any other day of the week? This one made me guffaw loudly and shouldn't be saved for a later day.

This photo was taken in County Kerry, Ireland.

"I heard there's a great place around here to drive your car off the cliff. It's supposed to be really fun! Oh! Look! There's the spot! Ok, ready...?"



Thanks to Natasha S.!

Customer Service

This photo was taken at a nearby post office.

Dear good mood reader,
Hope it makes you chuckle laugh.

That's MY downward dog!

It was a tough call today. I thought I knew what I was going to post until I passed this store on my way home today.

Despite years of practice, study and training, this yogi can't quite unlock the secret to hosting a successful yoga class. Each class seems to be ripped apart by petting bickering, competitive posing and overt bragging. No one can seem to figure out what is attracting this caliber of students....

Because waking up with night sweats isn't bad enough...

This ADmonishment is also a product...monishment.

While traveling during the holiday season, I happened to browse the the SkyMall catalog. Truly, that magazine is full of fodder for this blog but there is one in particular that stood out.
It's a product for women who suffer from night sweats.

As I read the product, I thought - what an ingenious idea! You wear it on your wrist and when it senses perspiration, it activates.

Now, like me, you're probably thinking "Activate? Oh, it gets cold and cools your body down?"

Oh no, my friends...

It's an ALARM.

So, in case you didn't know you were overheating, this baby will be sure to wake you up and allow you enjoy it full technicolor. And that's it. Once it wakes you up by buzzing and beeping, it's job is done.

I think they should make a whole series of these:

The PMS alarm: Are you feeling crabby and bloated? Let this alarm remind you!
The Stomach Flu Alarm: About to throw up? This buzzing and beeping will be sure to let you know!
The Death Alarm: Don't miss your last moments!

Ahhh, thanks SkyMall. You should think about making one to remind guys when they're about to buy their lady the worst present ever.

We'll get your carpet white--er, clean.

Kokomo Karpet Kleaners!
Because nothing says clean like KKK!

I'm so tempted to make this entry a list of rejected slogans for this company. I think it's safer to sit and giggle quietly to myself for now.

Thanks to Kyle J. for this goldmine.

Brainstorm

Here's how I like to imagine this conversation went:

Marketing Guy 1: Ok, team! We've got a new client! We've come up with a slogan

Where fitness is normal

Got it? We want it to be a place where people can feel comfortable, like they belong.
Now, we just need a logo.

Marketing Guy 2: Alright, let's break it down! First word: Where. Ok, where...where...how about everywhere? Being healthy and fit is something that anyone can get behind. So how about...the world?

Marketing Guy 1: I love it! Ok, next word: Fitness. What's an image that can represent fitness?

Marketing Guy 2: Easy! Everyone will know this:

Marketing Guy 1: PERFECT. Ok, last word...normal. What's an image that can tie this all together and represent normality.

Marketing Guy 2: I've got it! You're gonna love this...



I don't know about you, but nothing says "normal" to me like giant gorillas lifting weights on the Earth. Sign me up...

Signage Saturday

It's back!

Before we roll out this week's sign - here's the winner from last week's Signage Saturday.

Sign 1: Mr. Peanut loses his monocle, top hat and cane while swimming in the rain but is still happy
(Thanks Joanne C.!)

Sign 2: DO NOT USE HEAVY EQUIPMENT ON A LESS THAN SIGN
(Well done, Gary H.!)

Alright, it's time for this week's sign:

So...what's this sign saying? Send in your best (aka, your wittiest) guess to admonishments@gmail.com or leave your comment on this entry!

And while you're at it, why not submit your favorite sign to be admonished?

When bad t-shirts happen to good people

If you work in marketing, you learn very quickly that all ideas - from start to finish - need to be put in front of many pairs of eyes before going to print. Otherwise, something like this can happen:

Really cute idea...

Really bad execution...

Thanks to Stefania R. and Sam S. for help with this one. :)

Up a creek...

Imagine this scenario, if you will:

A lazy Sunday afternoon in the summer.
On a whim, you rented a canoe and are now drifting down the Chicago river - occasionally dipping your hand in the water as the current pulls you forward.
Slowly, you glide past a sign, posted along the bank:




Sorry - what was that last one?


Suddenly, you're remembering every splash, every drop, every touch of the water and you become acutely aware of a strange webbed feeling growing between your fingers.

Thanks city of Chicago. When my super powers from the radioactive river kick in, I promise to only fight for good.

Signage Saturday

The great thing about informational signs is that you have express an entire concept in one, quick image. Sounds easy, right? But how would YOU express the sentiment Danger! Crocodiles could eat you! or Hold on tight! in just one picture? Many have tried, my friend - resulting in a lot of hilarious signs.

Which is why ADmonishments is instituting "Signage Saturday" - each a week, a tribute at a great attempt to express whole concepts in one, hilarious picture and a chance for you to interpret it.

For our first entry, I couldn't decide between two signs. So...I didn't.




What's are these signs saying? Send in your best (= funniest) guess to admonishments@gmail.com or leave a comment in this entry.
And while you're at it, be sure to submit your favorite sign for Signage Saturday

Keeping up with the Joneses

That's right folks! For a mere $199.00, you too can have your very own roof leak! This is a limited time offer, so act fast!

It starts...

This blog can only begin with the picture that started my ADmonishing addiction, lo ten years ago:



It's not that I don't see the good intentions here. But did they have to make the phone number 888-30-CRACK?